The following, is a process I go through over and over again.
After much practice, self love, will just come naturally to you, allowing you to love others and for them to love you.
I recently did a course based on the concept of neuro-plasticity of the brain.
This taught students to change the parts of their personality that create unhappiness. Anything you want.From forgetting to brush your teeth to yelling at your wife.
If we practice self hatred for 30 years, then we get really good at it. And if we practice self love for 30 years, we can be wonderful at it too. Practice makes perfect.
Here are my personal guidelines to keep the love flowing on the inside.
1. Go Solo.
Try to spend at least an hour everyday by yourself.
It doesn’t matter what you do. You can meditate, work,play sudoku or give yourself a pedicure. It doesn’t matter. Just be in your own aura. As time goes on, try more passive type activities. Make it more difficult for yourself. See what thoughts come up.
For example:’ I am just sitting here and there are things to be done.’ ‘What if someone walks in and sees me doing nothing?’ or ‘I hope the kids are alright?’
Over time observe the thoughts that come up more often and dissect them. Ask your self what are these thoughts connected too?
Are they useful? Are they even my thoughts?
2. Thoughts without power.
Try to understand that all of these thoughts do not assist you in your life. They have no power.They should not control your life. You can analyse them when you are bored and laugh at them, cry at them, but don’t take them seriously. Life is far too wonderful for that!Remind yourself that the thoughts in your mind are there for the benefit of others.
Try to create a special place that you do this activity. Make it nice. Decorate this temple with something you like. A picture, a candle or a rug.I painted the walls of the basement room yellow and called it my lady cave. I framed some antique fabric and now I write this blog there.
4. The Rescue Mission.
Start to find the person behind those thoughts. These thoughts stop you from seeing who you really are. They stop you, from seeing who is really in control. It will allow your aura to shine forward into the stream of energy that it belongs in, riding the waves of love. Not tip toeing and meandering about, unsure of where to go because your thoughts are messing with you.Recognise yourself. In times of self doubt, fear and uncertainty, recognise yourself.
When you find that person behind those thoughts recognise them. Embrace them. Welcome them. He/she has been abandoned for a while. They have only been able to steal certain glimpses or tastes of real life. Let them step forward. Let yourself shine.
Try to understand who that person is through some kind of medium. Human Design is my tool of choice.
7. The Experiment
Understand it’s strengths and weaknesses. Experiment with that person. If your weakness is confronting, then try to do it more often. Don’t let your weaknesses make you unhappy.
8. Passenger Consciousness:
Observe your life from the back seat of a car. Watching the show, laughing, crying but never let those thoughts make you worry, unlove yourself through guilt, shame, bitterness, frustration or anger. None of these feelings are helpful to you, or your happiness. Observe, Observe, Observe.
Try to see the true design of others, who hide behind their fears, their strange behaviour, their unhappiness. Recognise the person behind the negativity and embrace them. Encourage them to be happier. Self love transforms itself into love for all beings when practiced over time.
10. Knee scraping
If you find yourself swirling down the rabbit hole to a place where self love is not abundant. Start from number one. Life is about falling down and getting back up again!
These steps will lead to further more practical and physical steps on the self love highway, better nutrition, exercise, loving your body and healthy communication will follow.